Austenland by Shannon Hale

WARNING: Here thar be spoilers! Not a lot. Just, you know...some.

First off, I'd like to say that I love this book. With all of my soul. Mr. Nobley is my spirit animal - and not just because I want to marry him. There are just so many scenes where the poor man suffers in silence. When the cheese and the ridiculousness are simply too overwhelming, and you can tell he's thinking, "Kill me. Please." 

That. Is. My. Life.

*Ahem* Moving on. More about my undying love for Mr. Nobley later.

You probably want to know what this book is about, don't you? How dare you be so needy. I guess I can tell you. It starts out - for the most part - with thirty-something Jane Hayes meeting her Great-Aunt Carolyn for the first time since she was a small child. Jane is put up to this entirely by her mother, who wants to make sure Jane gets in the will. What Jane wasn't expecting was that Carolyn would find out about her, uh, rather unhealthy obsession with Mr. Darcy. An obsession that runs so deep, it's interfering with her love life.

But, lo and behold, this does get Jane into the will! Just...not in the way anyone would have thought. Carolyn, who had encouraged her niece to move on from Mr. Darcy and live her life, leaves her an all-expenses-paid trip to... I'll give you three guesses and a hint: it's the title. Did you guess Austenland? Four for you Glen Coco. You go Glen Coco. Well, actually, the official name of the place is Pembrook Park. But let's be real here - it's a Jane Austen theme park.

So Jane decides that, yes, she will go to Austenland, dag nabbit! She'll kick this shameful addiction to Jane Austen and Mr. Darcy (but really, mostly Mr. Darcy) right in the butt, and finally be able to have a normal relationship. She hopes, anyway.

She packs her bags and sets off for London. Once in Austenland, Jane meets Mrs. Wattlesbrook, the owner. She is drilled on manners, taught to dance, and bedecked with Regency clothing. Then she is sent on her way to the main house, where the real adventure awaits.

Here she finds the other women who are staying there with her - Miss Charming and Miss Heartwright. There is also Colonel Andrews, who is very charming; Mr. Nobley (swoon), who is, essentially, a more verbose Mr. Darcy; and Captain East, who honestly has almost no personality. 

The hardest thing for Jane to adjust to in this Regency microcosm isn't the corsets, the ridiculous rules of etiquette, or the strange food. Instead, the hardest thing for her to do is pretend she is someone from Regency England. It is the pretending specifically, the act one must put on, that bothers her. She feels utterly ridiculous, completely uncomfortable trying to be someone she's not. Though she eventually gets the hang of it, she's never fully used to pretending to be Miss Erstwhile - her Regency self. 

Now, everyone who enters Austenland gets her very own romance with one of the male actors. With Heartwright paired off to East and Charming viciously clinging to Andrews, Jane is sort of left with Nobley. But she's not certain she likes him very much - he's rude and aloof and perhaps thinks a bit too highly of himself. Besides, he's playing a part. Theodore - or rather, Martin - one of the gardeners, is far more down to earth. Hanging out (and making out) with him nearly makes Jane unable to continue with the farce of Austenland as she is constantly reminded of the real world, and real men who are not paid to pay attention to her.

But Martin isn't all he's cracked up to be, and Mr. Nobley is, perhaps, more. 

In conclusion, I'd like to point a few important things. This is the part you really want to skip over if you don't want spoilers. Just, just go to the end. Right to the very end. G'head, I'll wait.

Great. Let's get down to business. *Has to physically resist breaking out into song*

This book is effing hilarious. It's definitely worth it, just for the humor. There's one scene when they're doing the play and Mr. Nobley heaves this sigh in the middle of one of his lines, and it nearly killed me. It was beautiful. 

Speaking of Nobley...(swoons again) he's perfect. Have I mentioned that? He's the smoothest, most romantic bastard you've ever seen. At one point, he literally sweeps Jane off her feet. He's hilarious, he's good-looking, he's British, he's sweet. What more can I say? He buys Jane paints to help her reconnect with her inner artist. He buys a plane ticket to America just so he can follow Jane on the plane, not sure how things will work out or how he'll get a visa. He leaves everything behind and blindly follows Jane, because he wants to be with her that much. And that is something. 

Jane is pretty damn amazing in her own right. She is witty, relatable, awkward, and has just the right amount of quirk. She is just a normal girl who is seeking love but is blinded by the high standards set by a fictional character. And haven't we all been there? Let's be honest with ourselves. I also like that Jane is a good, sturdy character. She never lets anyone walk all over her or demean her - well, except for her mother, a bit. But she's barely there anyway. I like that Jane just kind of whacks Sir John when he tries to feel her up, and down he goes. Nobley rushes in and she's like, "What? Nothing to see here. I'm all set. Thanks, though."

I also love how genuinely honest of a person she is, a quality of myself that I can see reflected in her. She is so herself, so utterly free of deceit or falsehood, that playing a character makes her uncomfortable. In pretending to be a Regency woman, she feels so utterly ridiculous because she feels like she isn't being true to herself. And I really like that.

And since we're on the topic of playing a part, I did want to mention how much I truly appreciated the dynamic at Pembrook Park. It is a tough line to walk, between reality and fantasy, and the employees and customers do just that. The actors are paid to be charming and have a "romance" with a certain guest. Their affections aren't true, but the guest has a hard time remembering that, and often gets themselves too involved in a relationship that isn't real. It is oftentimes impossible to tell whether an actor's actions are truly genuine or not. And in all honesty, I think this is a great mirror of real dating. When you first meet a person, you generally try to be on your best behavior and downplay your faults. You don't know the other person well, so you can't tell if they're being sincere or not. And when it really comes down to it, don't we all put on faces and pretend to be people we're not? So the actors at Pembrook Park had far more than one purpose.

The downsides of this book? Pretty damn close to nothing, but the one thing that did really irk me was how uncharacterized everyone but Jane, Nobley, and Martin were. They were very lackluster, very flat. Other than that one thing, I have few complaints about the book.

And since the rules about being firmly in the Regency era were so strict, I can't help thinking that if I was in Austenland, I would keep quoting famous works of literature and then when someone complimented me on how beautiful it was, I would say, "Isn't it, though? I'm thinking of writing a novel around it." And the sad thing is that almost no one would understand how truly witty I was. Or I would alter things from pop culture - like the Kardashians - to be time period correct just to see if anyone would break character to laugh.

Anyway, I fully endorse giving this wonderful book a read. I'd give it 4.5/5 stars.